I am addicted to adrenaline

I am addicted. Addicted to adrenaline, endorphins, passion, life, and mostly to sporty lifestyle. Physical effort that gives rest, helps to lose touch with the reality. It can sometimes cause pain but it is physical pain that gives satisfaction and a feeling that work has been well done. It is my safety valve in critical moments. Yes, I do have such moments. I am only human. Various twists and turns led to my strong, ‘iron’ body, which used to serve me well has just broken down. It wasn’t of natural causes…  a lorry that run into my car at the lights was a ‘good help’. Long-lasting exploitation of my body wasn’t helping either.  Tough times and I am left without any possibility to release stress?! Cruelty not to overcome.  Permanent stress and lack of physical activity. HELP!

Sometimes staying calm is the only solution.  Cold blood that was always my asset in boxing rings has to act in my life now. When something is broken, it has to be repaired, at least to the smallest, possible extent. And it is possible. Possible to considerable extent. Spine (my worst nightmare) can be operated and it will be handled soon. Shoulders, which had to cushion every punch, are now under treatment, regeneration and rejuvenation. My Achilles tendon will be like new very soon! Plasma works miracles! But what about my head? Nothing about it… you cannot replace it. The spine is connected with the head in a weird way.  They both suffer. They suffer because my heart beats too slow, is too weak, because my pulse doesn’t speed up, because physical effort doestn’t cause pain in the muscles. I know that I have to remain calm and live through the next months effortlessly. Therefore, I need to find some replacement.  Once again, I am truly grateful to fate for my passions. I have already got a plan to live through the next months.

I will get back to my roots.  I will take care of people I love and myself as well. I am also going to get creative. Creative?! Oh yes! Creative! I will not only open my own business but I will also get back to painting, which makes me happy… Especially at nights when my favourite music plays in the background.  I have almost forgotten this feeling.  Winter and autumn are the best seasons to remember and to revive that feeling.  I realized how lucky I am.  Once again! I have got several months (damn! what a luxury!) to slow down, create, take care of my neglected soul and wait until Damian does his job. I am waiting for the day when I will be well-rested, regenerated and full of passion to get back to my duties.  I will travel to space!